Types Of Mom Friends You Have Right Now
By Tara Clark
Excerpt from Modern Mom Probs: A Survival Guide for 21st Century Mothers, courtesy of Post Hill Press
I’ve said it once, and it’s worth repeating. Mom friends are crucial! They listen to us when we replay our fictitious life scenarios, normally reserved for the inanimate objects in our shower. Once you find your circle of friends, see if you can identify the types of mom friends. Bear in mind, you can be one or more of these archetypes at a time and grow into or out of some of these roles as well. Just have fun with it!
The Well-Informed Mom
She has her opinions about all kinds of things—nutrition, medical care, and education. She’s well-read and ready to defend her views. With her level of research, her opinions are usually, well, correct. She knows what the Board of Education is planning and what the town is doing about EVERYTHING. She knows all of the local events.
Why this mom friend is important: She’s passionate about her beliefs and is really knowledgeable. She may come off as opinionated and a know-it-all, but she means well. A real keeper!
The Type-A Mom
You know the type. Intensity in ten cities. This mom is a planner. She is the master of spreadsheets, calendars, and reminders. She’s always on time (even with her kids). Her kids go to bed on time every night (yes, this can happen). She’s busy, super-involved, and on top of it all. Count on this mom when you have zero clue when the next PTO meeting is supposed to happen.
Why this mom friend is important: This mom has work/life effectiveness down because it’s written in her calendar that way. Hanging around with her means you will always be on time when you arrive somewhere together, and you will always know what’s going on (and when it’s happening). Let her organization rub off on you a bit so you don’t show up an hour late for the spring recital (again).
The Type-B Mom
This mama is the contrast to Type-A Mom. She won’t remember sh*t. No clue about dates, doesn’t write any- thing down, and may or may not clean up before (or after) a playdate. She’s suuuuuuper chill. When she says she’ll meet you for coffee at 12:00 PM, she means more like 12:25 PM because she couldn’t get her life together that morning. She’s most likely to call her kids “little a–holes” but also is a ton of fun.
Why this mom friend is important: She is always up for having you over at her house regardless of the state of it. She’s just trying to make it through the day and wants a break. She’s a great listener, great to be around, and a perfect reminder that you can have happy kids without perfection.
The Out-of-the-Loop Mom
This mom doesn’t know the kids in the class or teachers that her own kids don’t have. She may not be up on the mom uniform, and she usually doesn’t know when school events are going to happen. She may be full of guilt over all of this stuff because it’s not that she doesn’t care, it’s just that she has some circumstances that make it challenging.
Why this mom friend is important: She is looking to you for guidance and friendship. She desperately wants to be in the loop and may have other obligations that prevent her from doing so. Be nice to her, support her, and let her know that you know she’s a great mom and you have her back.
The Crafty Mom
Not only does this mom have a Pinterest board, but she actually does the stuff on the board and posts her own pins. Beautiful birthday party decor? Done. Different door wreaths for every holiday? Uh-huh. Homemade wooden signs for her dining room? Yep. Chalkboard signs for the first day of school? Check. Has a Cricut for making custom birthday shirts every year? Bingo. This mom is unapologetically crafty, artsy, creative, however you want to say it (and I wish some rubbed off on me).
Why this mom friend is important: She’s ultra-creative. She’s the mom you can look to for the best Halloween costumes because she’s teeming with ideas. Your kid wants to be a mailbox for Halloween? She’s your girl. Just realize, she is not doing this to one-up any other parent. She’s just doing what makes her happy and to make special memories for her children. Don’t compare yourself to her. Maybe she can help you out and make that mailbox costume for your kid (because you should probably not attempt).
The Mentor Mom
This mama has seen it all. She may be juggling at least three or more children in different grades, different schools, and different extracurricular activities. She may even have older kids and a baby at the same time. She knows which teachers are the “best” ones to get each year. She loves to impart her wisdom to the new moms.
Why this mom friend is important: She’s like having an older sister who can offer sound advice. Since her experience covers a lot of ground, she can provide several different perspectives. Information is her currency.
The Ride-or-Die Mom
This friend is your to-go. The one you can count on. You can always trust her to be down for adventures. She’s up for anything you throw at her. Want to toss the kid in the car and drive to the zoo on short notice? Let’s go. Does she buy a six-foot beach ball for her backyard kiddie pool and pick up your kids for an epic playdate? Yep. She is fun and trustworthy. She’s most likely to be the school emergency contact for your children. You and your kid are having a rough day? She has the right words and zero judgment.
Why this mom friend is important: This mama is trustworthy through and through—as a pal and a confidant (Golden Girls reference fully intended). You can trust her with your secrets and even your children’s lives. This mom is a treasure.
The Modern Mom
This mom is a healthy combination of some or all of the above. She’s authentic, she’s down to earth, and she knows she’s not perfect (nor are her children). She knows parenting is a crapshoot every day. This mom is sympathetic, kind, fun, inclusive, and enjoys laughing.
Why this mom friend is important: The modern mom is all of us, and we are important.
